A Rather Full Trophy Case

Every now and then in the world of sports we are fortunate enough to witness something remarkable, something unprecedented and something that will probably never happen again. And as much as I would absolutely love to spend my time here ridiculing and wielding my words in such as way as to perpetually humiliate the Buckeyes for their inept display against the mighty Gators of the SEC (two times now in the span of a few months), I will not do such a thing.
I will, however, congratulate the University of Florida for what is essentially back-to-back-to-back championships and continue to proudly raise and wave the banner of the most powerful conference in all of college sports, the SEC.
It is simply an amazing accomplishment for Billy Donovan, Urban Meyer and their teams to do what they have done over the past twelve months. Three undisputed national championships in the span of a year is something of which legends are made.

Over the years, the NCAA Tournament has proven to be a literal gauntlet for many of the most talented teams in college basketball. What happens – more often than not – is that the “best” team in the country does not win it all, leaving many to scratch their heads and wonder “what could have been?” That may have been the case last year, but certainly not this year.
This Gator team was the best in college basketball from start to finish this season, no question about it. What’s more impressive than that is this: Donovan’s Gators have run that gauntlet two years in a row now, winning national championships both times. Coupled with their success in the SEC Tournament, they have now racked up eighteen consecutive post-season wins. They did it this year with the veritable bull’s eye on their jerseys all season long, making this year’s run maybe even more remarkable than the one a year ago. To my friends who are also members of the ever-expanding Gator Nation, congratulations again. Today is at least the third time in the last 365 days when you can say, “It’s great to be a Florida Gator.”

Now, onto the cynicism. If it is indeed true that “cynicism is the tool of the lazy thinker,” then call this criticism instead of cynicism. Whatever you want to call it, I have a few bones to pick with the handling of this year’s NCAA Tournament – by the refs, CBS, the Tournament Committee and Billy Packer himself.

First, the refs: unlike Packer (who I will deal with later), I do think that five personal fouls should mean disqualification for a player. I think, for the most part, college referees are fair and (unlike NBA refs) do not give preferential treatment to star players. So I do not have a huge problem with the number of fouls called on guys like Oden or Hibbert or Noah; that is part of the game. What I do have a problem with is consistency - as in, there is none. Last night’s National Championship Game was the epitome of inconsistent officiating and ambiguous calls. Oden all but tackled Brewer at one point as the Gator forward went up for a dunk – no call. On the other end, Noah swats at the ball and gets called for a foul. I could go on and on with examples – and not just from last night’s game. The entire tournament was poorly (see: Jeff Green moon-walking in the final seconds of Georgetown’s win over Vanderbilt and other occurrences) and inconsistently officiated. I am not asking for Noah not to get called for swatting at the ball, I just want consistency.

Second, CBS: you would think that the network was trying to set some kind of world record for number of commercials shown during a three-week span. If I see another one of those Chevrolet commercials with Dale Earnhardt, Jr. and some rapper driving a car to the tune of a new-age version of “Sweet Home Alabama,” I might just go postal.
Still, I have to commend Clark Kellogg for his analysis, which is outstanding year after year. He is simply one of the best studio analysts on television. I wish I could say the same for Seth Davis.

Third, the Tournament Committee: all I have to say is one word: Stanford. How in the world does Stanford get in the tournament? I know that each year there is at least one or two teams that get unfairly left out of the field and there is this endless debate over who should have gotten in or who should not have. But, Stanford? These guys went 18-13. They lost to Santa Clara by 16 and Air Force by 34.
And then they lost in the first round of the tournament to Louisville by 20. It was poetic justice, I guess you could say.

Finally, Billy Packer: he is easily the most annoying college basketball analyst this side of Dick Vitale. At least with Vitale, you know he’s going to champion the cause of Duke every time he opens his mouth (many thanks to the inventor of the mute button). With Packer, it changes from game to game. But no matter what, you always seem to get the same kind of pointless drivel coming out of his mouth.
Last night it was an in-depth commentary on how the Buckeyes looked tired from the opening tip. “Oden looks so tired,” he would say. “The Buckeyes are worn out,” he would add later.
I said earlier that if I see that Chevy commercial again, I will go postal. If I hear Packer talk about how tired Oden and the Buckeyes looked again, I will make the CBS analyst my first target. Somebody tell that admiral of asinine statements that it’s the NCAA Tournament and there is no tomorrow. So if you’re tired, too bad. You should have actually run wind sprints and committed yourself to conditioning back in October so that with fifteen minutes left in the first half you don’t look like Rosie O’Donnell climbing the steps to the local deli for another foot-long hoagie. Fatigue had nothing to do with it. Florida was just the better team last night, period. Come on, Packer, give credit where credit is due.

Overall, while the tournament itself was a little lacking in excitement (no big upsets), the Final Four was exactly what it should be. Four powerhouse programs made it to Atlanta and provided three pretty good games. As far as conferences go, the SEC and PAC-10 made the most noise, while the ACC and Big Ten (aside from Ohio State and North Carolina) didn’t even show up. That’s two years in a row that the ACC has underachieved in the tournament and you won’t hear any complaints coming from me. Hopefully it will keep Vitale’s mouth shut for a few months.

So, here I am, bidding farewell to March and the madness it held. I turn my attention away from basketball and toward baseball because I rank the NBA somewhere just above defrosting my freezer on my priority list. And, trust me, that’s not very high…